Hubby <3

My husband is amazing. One of the things he does is he'll look at me and just smile, then say "I love you. You're beautiful." I love it! He gets this look in his eyes that lets me know he really thinks it, too.

He also takes care of me and frets over me. Once, when I wasn't feeling well (turned out I was dehydrated and hypothermic from a walk we'd done in 90+ degree weather--long story), he paced the living room waiting for his dad to come and help him give me a blessing. He couldn't sit still and kept pacing to the window to see if his dad had gotten there yet, then coming back to where I was sitting on the couch... Even though I felt terrible, I thought it was adorable!

He loves being near me and just touching me. He'll sit next to me on the couch and put his arm around me while he plays a computer game, or play with my hair as I lay with my head on his lap.

When I worked in retail and was on my feet all day, there were a couple of times when I'd come home and just crashed. He would come over and take my shoes off, then start rubbing my gross, sweaty feet--if that's not love, I don't know what is!

I love to make things and work with my hands. Even though he doesn't really share those interests, he loves to see what I've made and admires them. He even likes to show them off to people and brag about them, which I can be too shy to do!

When he heard this song on the radio, he loved it. I think it describes the way he feels about me perfectly!

30 Pounds

In January, I realized I needed to lose weight. At 5'4" and nearly 170 pounds, I was overweight and bordering on obese. I was at risk for Type II diabetes, and wasn't happy with how I looked or felt. So, things needed to change.

I started eating more carefully--watching my carbohydrate intake, eating more vegetables, and having smaller portions. At first, I hated it. I was hungry, and CRAVED sugars and other carbohydrates. It was hard. I also started walking more, aiming for around 10,000 steps a day (which I sometimes got higher, other times lower, and measured by borrowing my hubby's pedometer).

But, I soon started seeing the numbers on the scale go down. Two pounds one week, nearly five pounds another. Then, one day, I pulled on a pair of size 12 pants and noticed that they were so loose I could pull them off without unbuttoning them! To celebrate (and because I knew I wasn't done yet), I went down to Goodwill and got a pair of size 10 jeans--the first I'd owned in a couple of years! Then, one day, I went in to Goodwill and tried on a pair of size 8s--and they FIT. AMAZING!! I couldn't remember when I last wore size 8 pants--probably in High School or the beginning of college!

In six months, I lost 30 pounds--which is HUGE! I was so thrilled! I have now steadied my calorie intake and such so that I am not losing anymore. I still watch my weight and weigh myself often. I'll sometimes gain a pound or two, then I watch what I eat more carefully and go for more walks.

I look at pictures from when I was in Utah in January, then look at my reflection in the mirror, and there is such a huge difference, in my face as well as the rest of me!

I have a growing pile of clothes that I don't fit in anymore, but haven't gotten rid of yet. I'm thinking I'll see if I can sell them to Plato's Closet or something, then donate the rest to Goodwill or see if somebody in my ward wants them. I should do that soon, as part of the weight-loss mind-change process--I don't need those clothes anymore, because I will never be that big again.

I like to look at myself in the mirror more than I did before--my closet doors are mirrored, and I used to avoid it. Now I'll look and say "Wow! I'm skinny!"

Yesterday, I was at Walmart and saw some khakis, and thought "I wonder..." So I grabbed a size 6 and went into the dressing room. I pulled them on... and they fit! I was thrilled! The last time I remember wearing a size 6 was when I was in middle school! Of course, I had to buy them. And all day long, I kept telling my husband "I'm skinny!"

The one thing I'm having trouble with is remembering that I'm so much smaller. I sometimes look in the mirror and go "Is that what I look like?" because, in a part of my mind, I'm still a size 12. I go places and will think something about my weight--then remember, that's not me anymore. People aren't going to look at me and think I'm fat. People won't even make note of what size I am, really. I do, however, get a little bit of a high when looking at clothes, then pushing past the size 12s and saying to myself "I'm smaller than that. I'm not that size anymore."